The great technology gap

Me & Dad

Me & Dad in Guatemala, 2008.

I must preface this post with the following:
  • I love my dad.
  • My dad cracks my shiz up.
  • My dad is generally tech/computer-savvy.
  • My dad always starts e-mails with “Dear Amy” and ends them with “Love, Dad.”
Today I was chatting on Google talk with my dad about some stuff he’s helping me sell on Craigslist. It made me remember how the first instant message conversation I ever had with him went (AOL IM FTW).
Me: hey dad, I’m coming home this weekend from school. Can you let mom know?
Dad: Dear Amy, That sounds like a plan. We will see you then. What time do you think you’ll get here? Love, Dad.
Me: um it’ll be after class and depending on traffic past chicago…. maybe after dinner ish?
Dad: Dear Amy: We will wait for you. Love, Dad.

Giggle.

Half Marathon is just a 5k with a 10 mile warm up T-shirts for sale

It’s time for another crazy fundraising idea from your favorite blogger… I’m selling fabulous t-shirts to benefit the Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation.

The shirt below (which will be blue with orange design), says, “A half marathon is just a 5k with a 10 mile warmup.” This design was inspired by some of our fabulous Team Challenge mentors, who sold shirts like this in years past. It’s also a fun saying in the running world. In case you were wondering, a half marathon is 13.1 miles. or, a 5k (3.1 miles) plus 10 miles. Please consider purchasing a shirt to benefit this AWESOME cause, and please wear them for your next 5k, workout session or just to support finding a cure for Crohn’s and Colitis!

PLEASE NOTE: You can pre-order til April 20 at 5 p.m. to save $1! (just place your order and I’ll issue a refund via Paypal). Shirts will be ready for pickup April 30. Any orders placed after April 20 will be the regular price of $15-18, depending on the size of the shirt.

Click here to place your order!

Gym humiliation: I’ll have what she’s having

We’ve all had them. A slip. A fall. A trip. A drop. An inopportune fart. A wardrobe malfunction. But when you’re at the gym, these embarrassing moments can be amplified in severity because you are surrounded by people you don’t know.

Check out my latest post over at FitMilwaukee.com. I promise you will laugh. If you don’t, well, you suck.

You have to visit FitMilwaukee to see my favorite story (titled I’ll have what she’s having)… but the one below is a close second:

Is that a roll of quarters in your pocket?

I was working out commando because it was laundry day. I wore cheap shorts that slide around a lot. I decided to do crunches on a balance ball. As I was sitting on it, I started to slip off the ball because of the slippery nylon shorts.
Because I was in the middle of my sets, I didn’t want to stop.
I failed to realize as I was sliding down the ball, the leg of my shorts was sliding up. Way up. Like ALL THE WAY up.
“Is it locker room cold in here or is it just me?”

~J.

Embarrassing gym moments

I’ve been asking my Twitter, Facebook and Dailymile friends to share their most embarrassing gym/working out moments for an upcoming article at FitMilwaukee.com. Do you have a funny story to share? Please let me know! If you’d like to be a part of this article but want to remain anonymous, that’s fine with me… just let me know.

And just because I can’t ask you to share without sharing myself… I’ll point you in the direction of two recent blog posts, dealing with farting at the gym and a wardrobe malfunction.

Feel free to use the Contact form or shoot me an e-mail (me-at-losingitwithoutlosingme.com).

I can’t be the only one…

I ask this question in all sincerity.

Do y’all fart when you’re working out? For some reason, when I’m working out, gas seems to work itself out of my body. I’m completely serious people. I beg you to be honest if you post a comment. And don’t give me any of that “I’m a woman and I never fart” bullcrap. We all fart. It’s nature. Also, farts are funny. I am a 27-year-old woman, but I still think farts are hilarious. I giggle like a kid, no lie.

For some reason, whenever I’m doing cardio (walking, jogging, elliptical, whatever), I can’t help but fart. They’re not very smelly farts. They’re not noisy farts. They’re regular farts. A one-gun salute. The trouser cough. A bottom burp.

Thank goodness I’m not the only one:

  • When you are running, you are using your efforts toward the running process, and, in addition to that, your digestion is being “helped along” by the exercise, so any gas in your system is moving along with great speed. It would be more difficult to suppress gas while running, as you can guess. (yahoo)
  • “Running makes me fart.” (Runner’s World)
  • “To tell you the truth…every run I fart.”  (Runner’s World)
  • “When I’m alone I don’t even try to hold it in.  Sometimes a little fart escapes on every 5 or 6 straight strides.” (Runner’s World)
  • “Farting while running is the best time to fart because you’ll never smell it (unless you’re on a treadmill or running with a strong tailwind).” (Runner’s World)
  • “You mean there are people that don’t fart when they run?  Or just don’t admit it?” (BeginnerTriathlete)
  • “I get the running farts a lot, but it seems to be the worst if I run at the gym on the treadmill.” (BeginnerTriathlete)
  • “I get the farts really bad whenever I run.” (BeginnerTriathlete)

I did some Internet research (yes, I spent almost an hour googling fart, fart machine, fart euphemisms, etc) and here are some fart facts:

  • It’s normal to fart 12 – 40 times per day, emitting between 0.5 and two liters of gas. You should only worry if you fart significantly more than this.
  • Farts contain gases such as nitrogen, carbon dioxide, methane, hydrogen, oxygen, and hydrogen sulphide. These gases are produced by bacteria that live in the digestive system and break down food into nutrients that the body can absorb.
  • There’s a company that makes special underwear, designed to reduce the smell of farts. NO JOKE. THIS IS A REAL PRODUCT.
  • Source: Uncensored English Vocabulary, Wikipedia

I’m not one to hold in a fart. That’s just an embarrassing moment waiting to happen. Now, I know that holding in a fart could be dangerous, “It’s tempting to hold in your farts to avoid embarrassment in social settings. But if you hold your farts in for too long, the gas can be absorbed in the blood stream and then exhaled as a bad breath” (Uncensored English Vocabulary).

So there you have it. I fart when I work out. Do you?