Bikram Yoga: What was I thinking?

Photo: Visit London

This is what I imagine hell is like. It’s smelly, it’s humid, it’s hot and you’re in a room with 30 other sweaty people. I was dripping with sweat – even my calves were sweating. Oh, and then class started.

Yeah that’s right. I was dripping sweat on my calves, feet, forearms and all the normal sweaty places before class even began.

I suppose that this description on the Bikram Yoga Milwaukee website should have been a dead giveaway, but I ignored it:

“It is normal to feel dizzy during class. Blood circulation and pressure changes rapidly this may cause dizziness. You will learn to love this euphoric feeling of stretching tight muscles.”

Lemme tell you, I did not find it euphoric. It was my first time trying Bikram Yoga. I was able to do many of the poses (or modified versions of them) thanks to my regular yoga practice, but oh my goodness, this fat girl couldn’t take it anymore.

After 30 or 40 minutes, I had to lie down. I couldn’t stand anymore. I couldn’t breathe (blame the asthma – I always have huge problems breathing when the air is hot and humid). I was seeing stars. I got dizzy. I thought I was going to puke.

Then I did something I swore I would never do until I’m at my goal weight. I took my shirt off in public. Ok, well it was a tank top but still. I couldn’t handle it anymore. I sat there in my sports bra and yoga pants. And then I wondered if I could get away with taking my pants off. I wanted it all off. I couldn’t bear it anymore.

The breathing, the dizziness, the nausea didn’t get better so I got the hell out of there at the 1 hour mark. Within 10 minutes, there were four of us in the lobby, dripping with sweat (sexy), out of breath (also sexy) all wondering what the hell we got ourselves into. Coincidentally, we had all gotten the Bikram Groupons. LOL.

I’m sure I’ll try it again, but I have no desire to do that again anytime soon.

0 Replies to “Bikram Yoga: What was I thinking?”

  1. I TOTALLY hear you on this one. I did the Groupon deal about a month ago-6 classes for $15. The first class was awesome. I was dressed appropriately and had room to move around. On the other hand, I was so into it, I stretched much further than I probably should have since the heat allowed me. I couldn’t move for two days after.

    Then in the second class I was joined by all 2,500 other Groupon folks. It was seriously ass-to-elbow in there and let me tell you… naked, hairy man-ass is not what I want to have at my elbows when I’m sweating that bad (er…ever.) I had to breath through my mouth cuz the smell was so rank. Worst of all, while we were on the ground, the teacher sweated on me while walking around. Ew! Ew! Ew!!

    I went back to a “normal” yoga class last Sunday and enjoyed it so much more. I think I have better form and breathing technique that way. Sure, I may not be able to go as far, but you know what… I’m ok with that.

    1. So glad I wasn’t the only one who thought she was going to die at Bikram! And sorry it took me so long to respond to your comment! I’m waaaaay behind!

  2. Oh man, I felt the same way! By the time class ended, I was dripping in sweat everywhere; underneath my arms, my stomach, my face, my legs, my boobs. I could literally form a pool of water underneath me.

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